ken_ni

Hooray! Probation pass. Just signed confirmation letter.
Boss was so generous for giving me good appraisals, most ratings were 8/10, hence I asked for any salary increment. Sadly, he aint sure who’s in charge of salary increment. So…Boohoo…

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There’s one guy, who’s amazingly cute gorgeous, but chubby though. He’s always mistaken for a girl/madam/whatever. Sadly, even his mom ought to pretend that she has two daughters. These were the incidents happened years ago when he used to wear his hair long and stupid blonde.

1. Grandma and grandson lift incident

In the lift, there were 5-6 people including him, the grandma and her naughty grandson. The grandson kept on kickin his luggage and making lots of noises. The grandma quickly stopped her grandson and said something that made everyone almost dropped to their knees.

"Eh, stop kicking jie jie (sister) luggage. Later jie jie (sister) scold you ah…"

~End~

2. Pizza hut incident

He and pals decided to dine at pizza hut. When he’s making his order, the waitress’ expressions went from smiling to shocking and gaspingly asked

"Kamu lelaki atau perempuan?"
"What?"
"Kamu lelaki atau perempuan?" with her malay accent
"Apa?"
"Saya tanya, kamu le-la-ki atau pe-rem-pu-an?"
"LELAKI LAH"

Damn fuck right…

~End~

3. Mom and 2 daughters incident

Mom, sister and him went shopping at the market. They stopped at a flower stall and coincidently, the florist happened to be his mom’s friend. Both of them did the hi-long-time-no-see greetings and chatted for a while, then the friend asked his mom

"So two daughters?"
"…………….." His mom just smiled

After they bidded each other goodbye, he asked his mom

"Why didn’t you say something?"
"Ma huan. No point. Make things complicated only.."
"………"

Shouldn’t his mom said something or at least a ‘No’. Cannot tahan, so salah and tak logic at all.

~End~

All these were acceptable since he used to have long blonde hair. But right now, he has his hair dark and short, still being mistaken for a girl.

Perhaps he is chubby and fat and tends to grow good cup-sized breast, may be even admired by flat-chested girls for that, but is there really any choice? I think besides having good breast, he also needs to grow large tent in his pant, real large tent.

My mum always wants me to slim down a bit and she’ll ask me bout losing weight whenever I call her.

I just want to say I’m sorry…..

Slimming down seems unreachable….

Cause I had……

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Sliced strawberry top with vanilla ice cream and condensed milk for dessert.

AND

I’ve downed 1Kg of SKI Divine wild strawberry yogurt for supper…down it went within a 20 minutes span….

I’m definitely reaching my 0.1 tonne goal.

WeeEEeee…….

It’s been continuously 4 days, my lunch hour was all about golf. Choosing clubs, swinging position, how many birdie and bla bla bla, turning me into a golf-talking-expert.

Today, someone suggested that I should start golfing too. I told him I am going to and will be practising golf every single night.

"Wow, that’s good. So, joining any clubs? Safra perhaps?"

"No. I’m joining the Yishun club."

"Huh? Is there any golf course at Yishun?"

"No, of course not. I’m gonna practise with Wii when I buy it one day…"

"..ha…ha…ha" *soft laughter*

Yea. I know the joke is lame and dry but enough of all the golf talk. It’s driving me crazy.

Have not been reading since working. A friend recommended me to read Haruki Murakami’s "Kafka on the shore". Hopefully I get to find the book in National library, too broke to buy any book.

At last, my aunt was fed up of the way I deco my room. After 4 months of staying together.

My clothes were never in the wardrobe, scattered around on bed.

My mattress, which I’ve took off the bedsheet wanting to clean it but never did, yet never put back a new bedsheet. This was 2 months ago.

Extension wires all over the floor due to only one switch in my room. Handphone charger, Ipod charger, notebook charger all on the floor…

A very loved pillow which I’ll never let anyone wash it cause it make my room smell nice. They call it ‘nuclear bomb’. I do keep a air freshener in my room in case any friends visit, so I can freshen up my room with Glaze’s sea breeze fragrance.

So, my aunt came into my room, suggesting to me that I should put bedsheet on, should do something with all those wires on the floor, should…….

No signs of bedsheet, wires let loose on the floor, same old smell that I love…

Last night was weird. I was watching the Victoria secret fashion show and somebody came knocking on the door, 2 CID, late at night. I was caught red-handed watching lingerie show…Crap

Anyway, the 2 malays claiming themselves as CID were looking for the previous owner or tenants, asking us this and that, yak, yak, yak, didn’t even bother to show us their badge. Finally, they checked our pass and went off.

Macam loan shark lah……